Last week, one of my very spontaneous friends called me on my lunch break and told me about a free concert that was playing that night at an outdoor venue in Salt Lake City. The band (Anberlin) was one of the groups that I listened to like crazy in high school and I, of course, said hell yes! Let's go! Time to revel in my high school memories!
Dilemma #1: I don't get off work until 5 and the concert started at 7. All I had to wear was my scrubs and Dansko clogs. Not quite the ideal outfit to jump around in at a rock concert.
Dilemma #2: We wanted to have an adult beverage before the concert and, therefore, we needed to find alternate means of travel to the concert.
Problems... that needed to be solved...
Solution #1: I ran to the mall after work (since I didn't have time to go home and change) and purchased some cheap jeans and some boots.
We didn't end up meeting until around 7 to go to the concert. We figured the band would have an opener and then they would play for a couple of hours. Plenty of time, right? As I was changing clothes, I noticed that the security sensor was still on my jeans. NO! We were already running late! We decided that we would run by the mall on our way to the concert and have them take off the sensor.
Success. The sensor-removal mission took all of three minutes.
Solution #2: My friend suggested we go to his work, have a drink, and get one of his buddies to drive us to the concert. After all, it was right around the corner! So we went and had a drink but couldn't find anyone to take us. Boo. We hopped on Trax instead.
We finally made it to the venue, hopped off the train, and ran over to the concert. We jumped on a little platform and could see the stage perfectly! We felt so lucky!! Then the people on stage stopped playing. We figured that they were the openers and that Anberlin was about to get on stage and ROCK OUR WORLD! We asked the girls in front of us who had just played. They said , "Oh! That was Anberlin! They just played their last song!"... It was 8:12.
They played for an HOUR. I guess now we know why the concert was free.
December 20, 2011
August 15, 2011
A Web of Disaster!
Sunday before last, started a series of very unfortunate events. Every weekend, I mow the lawn. You know, make sure the yard looks presentable, blah, blah. Well this particular weekend, the grass (and weeds!) were much longer than normal so it took me twice as long to cut the grass. That night, I noticed that I had, what I thought was, a mosquito bite on my lower leg. Small, red, itchy. No big deal.
When I woke up the next morning, I discovered that the small bite on my leg had turned into a GIANT bite on my leg. It. Was. Huge. No pain, which was good. But it was really red and itchy. Some kind of spider got up under my jeans when I was mowing the lawn and feasted on my flesh! So when I went to work, I showed it to one of the doctors that I work for. He thought it looked a bit fishy so he put me on some antibiotics. Cool. Just being on SOME kind of medication made me feel better about my ridiculously large spider bite.
So the next day, my leg was even more swollen and red. Yikes. My ankle had disappeared. Gone. So the doctor decided to add another antibiotic, double the dose of the first one, and add a decent dose of benadryl. I was thinking, "Woah, that is a lot of medication to be on at one time!". But I took everything, and survived the night. Awesome!
The next day, the bite turned an awful purple-y color and the swelling hadn't gone down at all. At this point, I was starting to worry. Visions of brown recluse spider bites were flashing through my head. Skin and tissue turning black, dying, and falling off. What if I lose my leg or something! Oh. My. God. Freaking out.
So my doctor doubled the dose of the meds for a second night. No big deal, right? WRONG! At approximately 12:30 am, my body said, "Oh, HELL no!", and decided to purge itself of all antibiotics. For 6 hours straight. Worst night ever. There is nothing worse (in my opinion) than being so incredibly sick like that. Lying there, alone, on the floor of my bathroom, sobbing like a little wussy, I was thinking about all of the things that I would rather be doing than throwing up my insides. Getting tortured in medieval England, being in a room full of clowns, running a marathon... Eventually around 6 am, I was able to crawl back into bed, sleep for a half an hour, and then call in sick to work.
I spent the next few days recovering from my horrible bout of sickness. And all of that because of a stupid spider bite. Which looks almost completely fine now! Maybe all the antibiotics did help?
Today I had to mow the lawn. Dun Dun Dun! I was not going to go through that again. So I went out prepared.
Step One: Acquire a pair of ski socks and put them on.
Step Two: Place cowboy boots over ski socks.
Step Three: Pull jeans over boots.
I'd like to see a spider get through THAT! Plus, a ton of bug spray never hurts. :-) Damn Georgia and your damn bugs!
When I woke up the next morning, I discovered that the small bite on my leg had turned into a GIANT bite on my leg. It. Was. Huge. No pain, which was good. But it was really red and itchy. Some kind of spider got up under my jeans when I was mowing the lawn and feasted on my flesh! So when I went to work, I showed it to one of the doctors that I work for. He thought it looked a bit fishy so he put me on some antibiotics. Cool. Just being on SOME kind of medication made me feel better about my ridiculously large spider bite.
So the next day, my leg was even more swollen and red. Yikes. My ankle had disappeared. Gone. So the doctor decided to add another antibiotic, double the dose of the first one, and add a decent dose of benadryl. I was thinking, "Woah, that is a lot of medication to be on at one time!". But I took everything, and survived the night. Awesome!
The next day, the bite turned an awful purple-y color and the swelling hadn't gone down at all. At this point, I was starting to worry. Visions of brown recluse spider bites were flashing through my head. Skin and tissue turning black, dying, and falling off. What if I lose my leg or something! Oh. My. God. Freaking out.
So my doctor doubled the dose of the meds for a second night. No big deal, right? WRONG! At approximately 12:30 am, my body said, "Oh, HELL no!", and decided to purge itself of all antibiotics. For 6 hours straight. Worst night ever. There is nothing worse (in my opinion) than being so incredibly sick like that. Lying there, alone, on the floor of my bathroom, sobbing like a little wussy, I was thinking about all of the things that I would rather be doing than throwing up my insides. Getting tortured in medieval England, being in a room full of clowns, running a marathon... Eventually around 6 am, I was able to crawl back into bed, sleep for a half an hour, and then call in sick to work.
I spent the next few days recovering from my horrible bout of sickness. And all of that because of a stupid spider bite. Which looks almost completely fine now! Maybe all the antibiotics did help?
Today I had to mow the lawn. Dun Dun Dun! I was not going to go through that again. So I went out prepared.
Step One: Acquire a pair of ski socks and put them on.
Step Two: Place cowboy boots over ski socks.
Step Three: Pull jeans over boots.
I'd like to see a spider get through THAT! Plus, a ton of bug spray never hurts. :-) Damn Georgia and your damn bugs!
May 23, 2011
Technology of the Ages
Recently, I have discovered that a lot of elderly people are becoming more and more interested in the newest technologies. What I still have yet to discover is how they can be involved with these, without knowing very much about them. Haha. Here are a few of my experiences with this wonderful combination.
* * *
At work, I deal with quite a few senior citizens.
A few weeks ago, I was working up a patient who brought her friend to the exam room with her. These ladies were in their... late-sixties? I was checking the patient's eye pressure, when all of the sudden, I heard a familiar tune. The theme song of Angry Birds. I turned around, and the lady was sitting there, playing Angry Birds on her iPad. Volume all the way up, you could hear the little birds squawking and getting flung into the air. I'm thinking, "Really? In the middle of an eye exam?". Then the lady yells to her friend and to me, "Have you ever played this game? It's the best thing ever! You have to fling birds into objects to kill these green pig-things. Each bird has special powers! It's great!" Bahaha. I never thought I would be taught the game of Angry Birds by a lady with two hearing aids, dentures, and a carpet bag.
* * *
We have recently put up signs in our exam rooms, asking patients to put their phones on silent and to refrain from cell phone conversations. It is distracting and rude! (That part isn't on the sign, but it probably should be...) It is surprising how many people are hopelessly addicted to their phones! We have so many patients who sit in the chair for 5 minutes, fiddling with their phone, until they finally say, "Do you know how to turn this thing off?" or "I don't know how to put my phone on silent." ...Really people? How can you own something without knowing how to work it?!
* * *
The other night, I was sitting at the theater waiting for Tim's play to start. Now, at this show, there were quite a few senior citizens attending the show. I was surrounded. While I was sitting, I tuned into two different conversations around me.
Conversation #1:
There were two elderly ladies sitting next to me. One very loud, very obnoxious one (who, very rudely, ordered me to move down a seat... bitch). And one very quiet, very soft spoken one.
- Loud and obnoxious: Did you know that blu-ray and streaming are different? I always thought that blu-ray was streaming. But no, blu-rays are the actual discs!
- Quiet and soft spoken: Really?
- Loud and obnoxious: Yes! I have only seen two blu-rays before. One was that Avatar movie. You know, with the blue people! It was in HD. And believe me, it was VERY HD.
- Quiet and soft spoken: Oh my word!
Every time I watch a movie, it has to be VERY HD. Or else, it's just not worth it. Haha.
Conversation #2:
Two old men were talking animatedly to each other about iPods.
- Old man #1: I have the Black Eyed Peas on my iPod. Do you like the Black Eyed Peas?
- Old man #2: Eh, I don't like the Black Eyed Peas very much, but I sure do like Fergie!
Haha! Fergie may not be able to sing, but, boy, can she attract 90 year old men!
* * *
Speaking of technology, my laptop is about to die. Until next time!
* * *
At work, I deal with quite a few senior citizens.
A few weeks ago, I was working up a patient who brought her friend to the exam room with her. These ladies were in their... late-sixties? I was checking the patient's eye pressure, when all of the sudden, I heard a familiar tune. The theme song of Angry Birds. I turned around, and the lady was sitting there, playing Angry Birds on her iPad. Volume all the way up, you could hear the little birds squawking and getting flung into the air. I'm thinking, "Really? In the middle of an eye exam?". Then the lady yells to her friend and to me, "Have you ever played this game? It's the best thing ever! You have to fling birds into objects to kill these green pig-things. Each bird has special powers! It's great!" Bahaha. I never thought I would be taught the game of Angry Birds by a lady with two hearing aids, dentures, and a carpet bag.
* * *
We have recently put up signs in our exam rooms, asking patients to put their phones on silent and to refrain from cell phone conversations. It is distracting and rude! (That part isn't on the sign, but it probably should be...) It is surprising how many people are hopelessly addicted to their phones! We have so many patients who sit in the chair for 5 minutes, fiddling with their phone, until they finally say, "Do you know how to turn this thing off?" or "I don't know how to put my phone on silent." ...Really people? How can you own something without knowing how to work it?!
* * *
The other night, I was sitting at the theater waiting for Tim's play to start. Now, at this show, there were quite a few senior citizens attending the show. I was surrounded. While I was sitting, I tuned into two different conversations around me.
Conversation #1:
There were two elderly ladies sitting next to me. One very loud, very obnoxious one (who, very rudely, ordered me to move down a seat... bitch). And one very quiet, very soft spoken one.
- Loud and obnoxious: Did you know that blu-ray and streaming are different? I always thought that blu-ray was streaming. But no, blu-rays are the actual discs!
- Quiet and soft spoken: Really?
- Loud and obnoxious: Yes! I have only seen two blu-rays before. One was that Avatar movie. You know, with the blue people! It was in HD. And believe me, it was VERY HD.
- Quiet and soft spoken: Oh my word!
Every time I watch a movie, it has to be VERY HD. Or else, it's just not worth it. Haha.
Conversation #2:
Two old men were talking animatedly to each other about iPods.
- Old man #1: I have the Black Eyed Peas on my iPod. Do you like the Black Eyed Peas?
- Old man #2: Eh, I don't like the Black Eyed Peas very much, but I sure do like Fergie!
Haha! Fergie may not be able to sing, but, boy, can she attract 90 year old men!
* * *
Speaking of technology, my laptop is about to die. Until next time!
April 26, 2011
Patience for Patients - Part II
Some more exciting stories from my days at the Eye Center!
This happens quite often with a lot of different patients. They just don't understand my instructions I guess!
Me: Okay, can you read those letters for me?
Patient: Yes, E-G-N.
Me: Good. I am going to give you two choices, and you tell me which lens makes those letters look better. Do they look better at number 1? Or number 2?
Patient: Number 2.
Me: Good. Now, number 3? Or number 4?
Patient: 2.
Me: The numbers don't mean anything. They are just a way for me to tell which one is better for you so don't get them stuck in your head. Now, do they look better at 3? Or 4?
Patient: 2. 2 looked better.
Me: Okay, but do they look better at 3? OR 4?
Patient: E-G-N.
Me: <mental head slap>
***
I get a lot of crap from people about how I don't look my age. About how young I look, to be more specific. Once, an 11 year old boy in an airport thought I was his age. I was 20. Maybe I will tell that story sometime.
Here are some recent quotes from patients about my age and appearance.
Patient: You're kinda small, aren't ya?
Me: (laughing) Yes, sir.
Patient: How old are you anyway?
Me: I'm 22.
Patient: Well you don't look it! You look like you could be in junior high school!
Me: (fake laughing this time) Oh, I hear that a lot!
Patient: I had a girlfriend your size once. It didn't work out. (Keep in mind this patient is in his late 70's. Awkward....)
Patient: How old are you? You don't look old enough to be working at a place like this!
Me: I'm actually 22.
Patient: What?! You are not! You look like you're 12!
Me: No mam, I am 22. Promise.
Patient: 22?! No. You aren't.
Me: Um, yes mam, I am.
Patient: No. You can't be! How long have you been working here?
Me: About 9 months.
Patient: Well, I guess that's good enough for me. At least you have experience. Even if you're not old enough to work here.
Me: ............ Let's check your vision.
***
This is about a 70-something-year-old female patient who has to use a few different eye drops nightly for glaucoma. The doctor is examining the patient's eyes through the slit-lamp.
Patient: Doctor, it's a good thing that I don't have a lover. Because he would not wait for me in bed at night while I put all these damn eye drops in!
Doctor: (mouth drops)
Me: (snickering to myself)
***
Here is a very accurate video about the joys of difficult patients! The actual movie looks and is silly but the conversation is extremely accurate! Thanks to the lovely Paige Besze for showing this to me!
This happens quite often with a lot of different patients. They just don't understand my instructions I guess!
Me: Okay, can you read those letters for me?
Patient: Yes, E-G-N.
Me: Good. I am going to give you two choices, and you tell me which lens makes those letters look better. Do they look better at number 1? Or number 2?
Patient: Number 2.
Me: Good. Now, number 3? Or number 4?
Patient: 2.
Me: The numbers don't mean anything. They are just a way for me to tell which one is better for you so don't get them stuck in your head. Now, do they look better at 3? Or 4?
Patient: 2. 2 looked better.
Me: Okay, but do they look better at 3? OR 4?
Patient: E-G-N.
Me: <mental head slap>
***
I get a lot of crap from people about how I don't look my age. About how young I look, to be more specific. Once, an 11 year old boy in an airport thought I was his age. I was 20. Maybe I will tell that story sometime.
Here are some recent quotes from patients about my age and appearance.
Patient: You're kinda small, aren't ya?
Me: (laughing) Yes, sir.
Patient: How old are you anyway?
Me: I'm 22.
Patient: Well you don't look it! You look like you could be in junior high school!
Me: (fake laughing this time) Oh, I hear that a lot!
Patient: I had a girlfriend your size once. It didn't work out. (Keep in mind this patient is in his late 70's. Awkward....)
Patient: How old are you? You don't look old enough to be working at a place like this!
Me: I'm actually 22.
Patient: What?! You are not! You look like you're 12!
Me: No mam, I am 22. Promise.
Patient: 22?! No. You aren't.
Me: Um, yes mam, I am.
Patient: No. You can't be! How long have you been working here?
Me: About 9 months.
Patient: Well, I guess that's good enough for me. At least you have experience. Even if you're not old enough to work here.
Me: ............ Let's check your vision.
***
This is about a 70-something-year-old female patient who has to use a few different eye drops nightly for glaucoma. The doctor is examining the patient's eyes through the slit-lamp.
Patient: Doctor, it's a good thing that I don't have a lover. Because he would not wait for me in bed at night while I put all these damn eye drops in!
Doctor: (mouth drops)
Me: (snickering to myself)
***
Here is a very accurate video about the joys of difficult patients! The actual movie looks and is silly but the conversation is extremely accurate! Thanks to the lovely Paige Besze for showing this to me!
March 10, 2011
Under My Skin
On a trip to the dermatologist today, I came across a lot of things that... get under my skin. Pun intended. :-P
I walked into the office and got in line to check in. There was a lady in front of me checking in. Totally cool. I got the afternoon off of work and was in no rush. Then another lady (with frizzy hair, if that helps your mental picture) walked in and got in line. But she was totally not cool with waiting. Apparently too special to wait in line, she walked through a door that read "Do Not Enter" and went over to the check-OUT counter to check in. Way to go lady. The whole waiting room is staring in your general direction and is most likely shaming you with their thoughts.
After checking in, I sat down close to an elderly couple. Immediately, the wife looks at me and then leans over to whisper something in her husband's ear. I was wearing my scrubs and I didn't exactly do my hair this morning but I had no idea what she could possibly whispering to her husband about me. I pulled out my phone to check a few things and when I looked up, she was staring at me again and leaned in to whisper something else to her husband. Um... Hello? I'm sitting two chairs away from you. I can totally see you talking about me. So, I got up and moved across the room.
And then, a hooker walked in! Okay, she wasn't a hooker (or was she?) but she was definitely dressed like one. She was wearing a black tube top and mini skirt with a belted, lime-green coat that went down to about mid-thigh. So, if you saw her from behind, you would think to yourself, "Is that lady wearing pants?!" And to top it off she had black heeled boots that went up to her knees. Oh, and she was NOT attractive which made it even worse. Again, the entire waiting room was staring in her general direction, most likely thinking, "Slut." She checked in and sat down next to me. I would take her over Gossiping Grandma any day. In her defense, the lime-green coat would have been super cute with jeans.
I finally got called back and they put me in a room and told me change into a gown. In Georgia, they have paper gowns instead of cloth gowns. I never knew how much I took those cloth gowns for granted. Paper gowns are the worst. So uncomfortable. So I put it on and sat down in the chair. You would think that they would keep their rooms (in which they put half-naked people) at a comfortable temperature. But no. It was freezing. And those paper gowns do not aid in keeping you warm.
It was an interesting trip to the dermatologist for sure. After the removal of a suspicious looking mole on my back (ouch!), I was finally able to leave and enjoy the rest of my afternoon off. I just watched the Survivor episode that I missed last night. So awesome! Ah... I think every Thursday should be a half-day. :-)
I walked into the office and got in line to check in. There was a lady in front of me checking in. Totally cool. I got the afternoon off of work and was in no rush. Then another lady (with frizzy hair, if that helps your mental picture) walked in and got in line. But she was totally not cool with waiting. Apparently too special to wait in line, she walked through a door that read "Do Not Enter" and went over to the check-OUT counter to check in. Way to go lady. The whole waiting room is staring in your general direction and is most likely shaming you with their thoughts.
After checking in, I sat down close to an elderly couple. Immediately, the wife looks at me and then leans over to whisper something in her husband's ear. I was wearing my scrubs and I didn't exactly do my hair this morning but I had no idea what she could possibly whispering to her husband about me. I pulled out my phone to check a few things and when I looked up, she was staring at me again and leaned in to whisper something else to her husband. Um... Hello? I'm sitting two chairs away from you. I can totally see you talking about me. So, I got up and moved across the room.
And then, a hooker walked in! Okay, she wasn't a hooker (or was she?) but she was definitely dressed like one. She was wearing a black tube top and mini skirt with a belted, lime-green coat that went down to about mid-thigh. So, if you saw her from behind, you would think to yourself, "Is that lady wearing pants?!" And to top it off she had black heeled boots that went up to her knees. Oh, and she was NOT attractive which made it even worse. Again, the entire waiting room was staring in her general direction, most likely thinking, "Slut." She checked in and sat down next to me. I would take her over Gossiping Grandma any day. In her defense, the lime-green coat would have been super cute with jeans.
I finally got called back and they put me in a room and told me change into a gown. In Georgia, they have paper gowns instead of cloth gowns. I never knew how much I took those cloth gowns for granted. Paper gowns are the worst. So uncomfortable. So I put it on and sat down in the chair. You would think that they would keep their rooms (in which they put half-naked people) at a comfortable temperature. But no. It was freezing. And those paper gowns do not aid in keeping you warm.
It was an interesting trip to the dermatologist for sure. After the removal of a suspicious looking mole on my back (ouch!), I was finally able to leave and enjoy the rest of my afternoon off. I just watched the Survivor episode that I missed last night. So awesome! Ah... I think every Thursday should be a half-day. :-)
March 8, 2011
Patience for Patients
At the eye center we see a variety of patients. Most of the patients I deal with are of the elderly population. Each day there is at least one patient worth telling others about. Whether they are funny, creepy, crazy, weird, or just plain nice, I always come home with a story to tell.
Here are a few of my favorites.
This story is about an 86 year old woman with fire-engine-red hair.
Me: "How are your eyes doing?"
Patient: "I need to show you something."
Me: "Okay."
Patient: "Doors are like clouds."
...what?
Me: "Oh yeah?"
Patient: "Look, you can see things in them." (She walks over to the door.) "See? There is a circle thing here, and see these two lines going down?" (She points to random lines on the door.) "It looks like a trash can. Or a pipe."
...okay...
Then, later in the exam...
Me: "Do you use any tobacco products?"
Patient: "Nope. Never. I get drunk and raise hell! Sure! But I don't use tobacco products."
Again... this lady is 86.
***
This next one, I have heard with plenty of patients.
Patient: "I have trash in my eye."
Me: "Trash?" <thinking about a rotten banana peel or a smashed styrofoam cup>
Patient: "Yes, there is trash in my eye."
I look at the patient's eye through the slit lamp microscope.
Patient: "Well? Did you see any trash?"
Me: "Nope. No trash. Your eyes do look a little dry though."
***
A little while ago, I had a 40-something year old female patient. She was extremely high strung to say the very least. Fast talker, this one. Anxious. As I prepare to put an eye drop into her eye, she says that she does not do well with eye drops and things being close to her eye. Okay. Fine. About half of our patients have this exact phobia. It's nothing I haven't seen before. Nothing I can't handle, right? Wrong. I get ready to check her eye pressure. Now, checking pressure involves touching a small, blunt, cone-like thing to the surface of the eye (just barely touching it!). But never fear. We put a numbing drop in your eyes before we do this so you can't feel a thing. Not a big deal. Generally, we don't tell patients that we are about to touch their eyeball because it kinda freaks them out. Usually we don't tell them, and they never know. I start to get close to her eye with the device and she puts her hands up and says, "Wait, what are you doing?" Now, when they ask, I have to tell them. So I explain what I am going to do (in the least terrifying way possible) and tell her that she won't even feel it. She. Freaks. Out. You would have thought I was coming at her with a machete. She starts crying and squealing and saying, "Oh my God. Oh my God!" Over and over again while fanning herself with her hands. Wow. I had no idea what to do. I was eventually able to console her and she finally calmed down. I was able to check her pressure and guess what? She was fine. Didn't even feel it. A miracle! Then she says, "Well... that wasn't so bad." Sheesh.
***
The other day, while I was checking an elderly man's eye pressure, the bottom part of the device touched his mouth. This can happen if the patient has large lips or a protruding chin. So the device touches his lips (which I was completely unaware of).
Patient: "Are you kissing me?"
Me (surprised and pulling the device back): "Oh no sir. That was just part of the slit lamp that touched you. I'm sorry."
Patient (smiling): "So am I!"
***
Well, that went a bit longer than I planned so I will stop here for now. But I work five days out of seven. Be prepared for more.
Here are a few of my favorites.
This story is about an 86 year old woman with fire-engine-red hair.
Me: "How are your eyes doing?"
Patient: "I need to show you something."
Me: "Okay."
Patient: "Doors are like clouds."
...what?
Me: "Oh yeah?"
Patient: "Look, you can see things in them." (She walks over to the door.) "See? There is a circle thing here, and see these two lines going down?" (She points to random lines on the door.) "It looks like a trash can. Or a pipe."
...okay...
Then, later in the exam...
Me: "Do you use any tobacco products?"
Patient: "Nope. Never. I get drunk and raise hell! Sure! But I don't use tobacco products."
Again... this lady is 86.
***
This next one, I have heard with plenty of patients.
Patient: "I have trash in my eye."
Me: "Trash?" <thinking about a rotten banana peel or a smashed styrofoam cup>
Patient: "Yes, there is trash in my eye."
I look at the patient's eye through the slit lamp microscope.
Patient: "Well? Did you see any trash?"
Me: "Nope. No trash. Your eyes do look a little dry though."
***
A little while ago, I had a 40-something year old female patient. She was extremely high strung to say the very least. Fast talker, this one. Anxious. As I prepare to put an eye drop into her eye, she says that she does not do well with eye drops and things being close to her eye. Okay. Fine. About half of our patients have this exact phobia. It's nothing I haven't seen before. Nothing I can't handle, right? Wrong. I get ready to check her eye pressure. Now, checking pressure involves touching a small, blunt, cone-like thing to the surface of the eye (just barely touching it!). But never fear. We put a numbing drop in your eyes before we do this so you can't feel a thing. Not a big deal. Generally, we don't tell patients that we are about to touch their eyeball because it kinda freaks them out. Usually we don't tell them, and they never know. I start to get close to her eye with the device and she puts her hands up and says, "Wait, what are you doing?" Now, when they ask, I have to tell them. So I explain what I am going to do (in the least terrifying way possible) and tell her that she won't even feel it. She. Freaks. Out. You would have thought I was coming at her with a machete. She starts crying and squealing and saying, "Oh my God. Oh my God!" Over and over again while fanning herself with her hands. Wow. I had no idea what to do. I was eventually able to console her and she finally calmed down. I was able to check her pressure and guess what? She was fine. Didn't even feel it. A miracle! Then she says, "Well... that wasn't so bad." Sheesh.
***
The other day, while I was checking an elderly man's eye pressure, the bottom part of the device touched his mouth. This can happen if the patient has large lips or a protruding chin. So the device touches his lips (which I was completely unaware of).
Patient: "Are you kissing me?"
Me (surprised and pulling the device back): "Oh no sir. That was just part of the slit lamp that touched you. I'm sorry."
Patient (smiling): "So am I!"
***
Well, that went a bit longer than I planned so I will stop here for now. But I work five days out of seven. Be prepared for more.
March 5, 2011
Welcome to the South!
I moved from Utah to Georgia at the beginning of last summer. Leaving my friends and family, I embarked on a new journey to the south to move in with my boyfriend Tim. The south is... different. Especially compared to Utah. It has definitely been an experience!
There are some great things about living in Georgia!
1. Food. Peaches, peach cobbler, candied pecans, fried green tomatoes, fried chicken, and boiled peanuts are among the great foods that make up the cuisine here in Georgia. Mmm... :-) It's no wonder that this state has a high obesity rate. I mean, it's a good thing I have a decent metabolism and will power not to eat everything I see.
2. Scenery. The peach and pecan tree orchards are so beautiful here! Especially at sunset!
3. Atlanta. It is definitely fun to visit the city now and then. My friend Ali has introduced me to salsa dancing and we have gone dancing at a few clubs in Atlanta. I never thought I would be one to go dancing at clubs, but, it is seriously a blast!
Some bad things about living in Georgia...
1. Everybody smokes. It is seriously gross. You go dancing at a club or go to a bar and you come home wreaking of smoke. It clings to your clothes, your hair, everything. Yuck.
2. You cannot buy alcohol on Sundays. Weird? I know. But I guess we are in the Bible Belt.
All of the girls I work with have thick southern accents. We both make fun of each other about the way we talk and the sayings that we use.
For example:
The word "oil". Southerners pronounce it "ull". Like there isn't even an "i" in the word! Same thing goes for "boil". They prononce it "bull". Like, "Let's order some "bulled peanuts".
A saying they have that I don't understand is "fixin'". They say, "I'm fixin' to make dinner." or "I'm fixin' to go to the store.". What are you fixing?! How about, "I'm going to make dinner." or "I'm going to the store."?
And everyone knows this one. "Ya'll." In fact, everyone here makes fun of me for saying, "You guys.".
Well, those are just a few things about the south that I wanted to share! I'm sure there will be more additions as time goes on! Like I said, it has been an experience. A good one though. :-)
There are some great things about living in Georgia!
1. Food. Peaches, peach cobbler, candied pecans, fried green tomatoes, fried chicken, and boiled peanuts are among the great foods that make up the cuisine here in Georgia. Mmm... :-) It's no wonder that this state has a high obesity rate. I mean, it's a good thing I have a decent metabolism and will power not to eat everything I see.
2. Scenery. The peach and pecan tree orchards are so beautiful here! Especially at sunset!
3. Atlanta. It is definitely fun to visit the city now and then. My friend Ali has introduced me to salsa dancing and we have gone dancing at a few clubs in Atlanta. I never thought I would be one to go dancing at clubs, but, it is seriously a blast!
Some bad things about living in Georgia...
1. Everybody smokes. It is seriously gross. You go dancing at a club or go to a bar and you come home wreaking of smoke. It clings to your clothes, your hair, everything. Yuck.
2. You cannot buy alcohol on Sundays. Weird? I know. But I guess we are in the Bible Belt.
All of the girls I work with have thick southern accents. We both make fun of each other about the way we talk and the sayings that we use.
For example:
The word "oil". Southerners pronounce it "ull". Like there isn't even an "i" in the word! Same thing goes for "boil". They prononce it "bull". Like, "Let's order some "bulled peanuts".
A saying they have that I don't understand is "fixin'". They say, "I'm fixin' to make dinner." or "I'm fixin' to go to the store.". What are you fixing?! How about, "I'm going to make dinner." or "I'm going to the store."?
And everyone knows this one. "Ya'll." In fact, everyone here makes fun of me for saying, "You guys.".
Well, those are just a few things about the south that I wanted to share! I'm sure there will be more additions as time goes on! Like I said, it has been an experience. A good one though. :-)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)